Anyone who listens to my podcast knows I’ve been playing World of Warcraft since Vanilla. Over all that time, I’ve had one main toon, my paladin Janaelle who currently resides on the server Twisting Nether. That’s not to say I don’t have alts; my shaman Luthvien was my main raiding toon during Cata, my DK Orest was my main pvp toon during Cata, and for the last quarter of BC I played a warlock when my guild exploded with healers. Always, though, I’ve been drawn back to my paladin to take names, kick ass, and gather EVERYTHING of Jan. I hoarded items, clothes, crafting mats, achievements, mounts, and pets all on that one toon. After so much work was put into her, so many hours, such a high play time value, why would I ever waist all that time spent and choose a new main? I had invested in Janaelle.

Thanks to patch 5.0.4, I am now invested in my entire account! All my achievements (well most of them) from her are shown on all my other toons. All the mounts, pets, etc. that I’ve gathered can be shown off on any of the four servers I currently inhabit. No longer will I feel like an alt is lacking because all that time, all those accomplishments, can’t be seen. No longer will I feel like one of those “Oh, I’ve done that but can’t prove it” jackasses. GG Blizzard.

Oh, and Ray, you’re not a special pony. Hmm, guess I lied.

Now at $5,000,000 in donations and with 22 days left in their campaign, Ouya is off to a great start in getting out to the public and helping shape the course of games and consoles for the next decade. I’ve been keeping up with all things Ouya, and compiled a short list of new information to pass along.

Here are the Specifications (which I didn’t list before) for the Ouya:

• Tegra3 quad-core processor
• 1GB RAM
• 8GB of internal flash storage
• HDMI connection to the TV, with support for up to 1080p HD
• WiFi 802.11 b/g/n
• Bluetooth LE 4.0
• USB 2.0 (one)
• Wireless controller with standard controls (two analog sticks, d-pad, eight action buttons, a system button), a touchpad
• Android 4.0

The big announcement is that the Ouya will be ready to ship in March and will be usable in other countries (so long as those users purchase of an adapter). At the beginning, though, the Ouya will only be available in English.

Now for what everyone really wants to know about, the games. Games, games, games. A console without games would just be a pricy paperweight so here we go.

Meteor, the maker of Hawken recently pledged their support for the Ouya putting their free to play mech mmo on the console as well. Mojang has committed that Minecraft (and their other games) will be on Ouya with some conditions. The console has to be good and people have to want it. To that end, the Ouya development team has put up a survey for those interested to fill out saying what games they want to see available on the Ouya. It can be found here.

More games have yet to be announced as apparently the developers of the console are swamped with requests and want to release a full list all at one time. So, more information on games will be coming, but, while not gaming exactly, the Ouya can support any apps built for Android and will be launching with Twitch.TV.

After a lot of questions, they’ve also said this about how they want their console and its free to play model to work:

We want you to pay only for the games you love. A “free to play” model works when everyone (gamers and game makers) benefits from directly rewarding amazing games.

For gamers, every game will be free to play: what this means is that there will at least be a free demo, or you’ll be able to play the entirety of the game for free but may have access to additional items, upgrades, or other features that come at a cost.

For developers, free to play means that they can set their own prices. Developers know best: There is no better way to sell a game than to have folks that have actually touched the game share glowing reviews with their friends. By allowing some form of free play, we’ll help them do just that. The only reason you used to pay for games before playing them is that you couldn’t try them at the store before you brought them home – it’s a relic of an old way of doing business, and one of the many things about the games business we plan to change.

For more news and updates on the Ouya, check back here and follow @playouya

THIS FUCKING SUCKS

No, I don’t live in the area hit by that giant black out, I just moved into a new house whose only access to the Internet is through a company called SuddenLink. They’ve told me they’ll hook me up with internet at the end of the month because they have the worst customer service I have ever experienced. I just know that when TimeWarner and/or AT&T moves into the area, nearly everyone is going to switch.

This sucks. In case you missed that, THIS SUCKS. My only access to the internet is through my phone and that’s completely useless. Alright, not completely. I gave myself tendonitis typing out tweets and emails and texts.

Though it’s not like I’m going stir-crazy with boredom. I’ve read two books, caught up on some old PS2 games, unpacked most of my belongings, took a class in algebra which takes up most of my week and am spending way, way too much time with my family. I love them, but this is crazy.

Goddamn SuddenLink.

I WANT MY INTERNET BACK

UPDATE: Two days after launch (7/12), the kickstarter campaign is up to $4,000,000 with 30,000 backers. There’s still plenty of $100+ pledges available which gives you a console before they hit store shelves.

UPDATE: The day AFTER the launch of the kickstarter campaign, they have raised $3,000,000. That’s TWO MILLION DOLLARS over what they were asking for. They’ve also upped the amount of units purchasable right now so as of 7/11, there are 30,000 still purchasable.

What. The. Fuck.

So today (7/10), a Kickstarter campaign launched to bring gamers an all new console, the Ouya (“ooh-yuh”). A fully hackable console that is designed for indie developers. Julie Uhrma and her team (including early Xbox pioneer Ed Fries and One Laptop Per Child designer Yves Behar) think it’s high time Microsoft, Sony and Nintendo rethink how they make consoles.

“I just think closed is the wrong way of doing things,” Julie Uhrma said. “I see unbelievable indie content out there, and watching ‘Indie Game the Movie’ and watching their faces as they wait for Microsoft to approve [their game], it just didn’t make any sense.”

If you don’t know, the current consoles made by Microsoft, Sony and Nintendo are all closed systems. That means they only let licensed developers make games for their consoles and only grant those developers the debug kits that are required to create games. Plus, all game development must be approved before it can be sold so as Kotaku put it, they “serve as gatekeepers for nearly every game made on their machines.”

But not the Ouya:

“The circuit board will have well-documented test points. People can swap out chips, add, etc. We may even publish the hardware design if enough people are curious. Because Ouya will also have Bluetooth and a USB, hardware hobbyists can also make their own peripherals (someone already suggested pinball controls to us). Regarding the software, you’ll be able to root the device easily. It won’t void your warranty. Every unit has a debug console. We are even working on the idea of a “plant”—which will restore your profile after rooting your device (reverse your root). Because it’s built on Android, you’ll understand the source code well, too. (Obviously if a hacker roots the device, our integrated user experience and game store will no longer be available while the device is rooted — so there is, as always, a tradeoff between customizing your device and enjoying the benefits of standardization. We expect the true hackers to be an elite, but small proportion of the total number of people who buy the box. Most people will probably just use the standard setup.)”

Here’s the real kicker: the Kickstarter campaign is already fully funded. As of 5PM, they’re almost $200 thousand over what they originally asked for with only 3,000 $100 pledges left up for grabs. This thing is happening people, so if you want in at the beginning of the race, buy one NOW.

So I’ve been working on this  mockery of a Asian village for a while now on the Slash 2 severs run by @frak_you. It started from a picture of a Chinese wall next to a river. From that I built a wall, then a church and it just continued from there.

My villagers worship the man in black. He has a cane, so I also believe he’s a pimp. The rest of the village sprang up around this church.

A huge wheat field, several houses, a well and a pen for animals. Of course, any good village needs a General Store.

My villagers started having children, so I just had to build them a pool. A pool surrounded by diamonds. Because it’s pretty.

After this, I had no clue what to do. So I built a bridge across the water! It seemed like a good idea at the time.

In the picture you can see the garden I then built on the other side of the bridge. At the time I finished the bridge, I really had no idea what to build next. An Asian garden seemed like a great addition to an Asian village, so that’s what I came up with.

After this, I figured that if this was my village, I sure as hell needed a palace.

This was the biggest undertaking yet. Two floors, nearly a dozen rooms, a dungeon and a garden. Lava chandeliers, a throne room, and a library maze top off Jan’s palace.

After this I took a long break from Minecraft. What was there left to do? I should have realized then, but I needed a harbor.

With plenty of warehouses, there’s also a place for the pirates to live before they go out and rob…uh…right, well, it’s got cobwebs and stuff.

There were some struggles, like when @vahete kept hitting me with chickens or @rayfyst filled my pond with…more chickens. The worst was when I used dynamite on a sponge. There was logic behind that I assure you, but the result has been a section of land I can’t fill with water. That section of land is in the middle of my damn harbor, pretty much making the whole thing look stupid, but in my frustration something good came of it. A water tree.

I told myself no, that this was too much and no one would care. That, more than anything, held my hand as it would be painful to find out no one really gives a shit. The more I write, though, the more I realize I do this for me. Sure, the post views are nice, but I create for me.

For the first time in my life, I am proud of something that I’ve accomplished. That’s why I never want to stop blogging, or podcasting. That’s why I am going back to school for a journalism degree. That is why I do what I do and yet, I haven’t told my family. Partially it’s because my podcast is raunchy and they don’t know I’m bisexual, but really it’s because they have never been supportive of anything that doesn’t follow their vision of normal.

In the past, I have spoken of dreams or goals that, to them, were unrealistic or too difficult to achieve. Once upon a time, I wanted a PH.D in marine biology with which I could study sharks and teach at the Univercity of Hawaii. I was 18 and I knew how hard that path would be, but I wanted it bad enough to work my ass off and give up the next ten years of my life for it. My family, for all that they truly love me, told me over and over how this was such a horrible idea, how I would go no where and end up poor.

Poor. The connotation for my family is that to be poor is weakness. It is failure. I didn’t want to disappoint them, I didn’t want to be poor. I changed my major, I changed the school I would attend, but I didn’t want any of it. Two years later, I sabotaged my family’s dreams and dropped out of college. I became poor.

This event was neither the first or last time their certainty in my failure would turn my dreams into ashes, but it was the first time I fought against what I didn’t want. I can’t say I did it consciously, or even that I did it the best way I could, but I did it. That was when I latched onto the concept of independence, of doing things on my own and even still I can’t let go of that, but I can finally say what I want and what they want for me will never be the same. I desire greatness. My family, who loves me, wants only better than average and easily attainable.

Normal.

I do not have the greatness I want, but I am not normal. I am a bisexual, pot smoking, gaming chick. I am a recovering victim of sexual abuse. I am a 26 year old, single, college drop out making $45,000 a year and buying my very first house. Maybe that’s normal, but I don’t think so. I have all this, but I want more.

I want to be invited to E3, the Tokyo Game Show, and other trade shows because of my work on my blog and the 5wowthings podcast. Do I realize how hard and unlikely this is? YES, but I want it and I’m willing to work hard to get it.

But what happens when I tell my family about this thing that I am so proud of? Together, will we sabotage my dreams again? That’s what I’m afraid of, but I don’t want to be afraid any more. I’m proud of this and I don’t care who knows. But I’ve said that to myself before.

Once again I’ve scoured the news releases to bring you all of the information I can find, this time about the new Microsoft Tablet, Surface. Announced in Los Angeles this Monday, it’s made a splash in the hardware market, but there’s more speculation than real facts out there.

So what do we know? There will be be two versions of the Surface, consumer and enterprise. The later is for consumers and the former for the workplace and is called the Surface Pro. The consumer version will release first and the Pro version about 3 months later. There were no prices given for either version, but we’re told they will be priced “comparably” to other devices on the market. The Surface could therefore be priced anywhere from $499 to $829 as Apple’s most basic version of the iPad retails for that much, depending on the model. The Surface Pro will run around $1,000 as that’s what ultrabooks typically run for. Unfortunately for Microsoft, most annalists are saying the same thing, “Microsoft will need to significantly undercut the iPad to be competitive.” (Peter Misek, Jason North, and Billy Kim of Jefferies & Company, Inc)

Surface will run on Windows RT, which is a version of the new Windows 8 specifically made for tablets on an ARM processor in 32- and 64-gigabyte versions. For those of you (like me) who don’t know what that means, I found a fun fact that microchips designed by ARM are inside 95% of the world’s smartphones and tablets. Well, at least we know it’ll work. The full version of Windows 8 will be available on the Surface Pro will in 64- and 128-gigabyte versions, powered by an Intel Core processor.

Both tablets are optimized for Skype and have USB ports which means they will have the ability to connect to a wired Xbox 360 controller, mouse, and even possibly Kinect. So, theoretically, Surface could support the XBLA library or downloadable versions of current games. Assuming Microsoft releases some kind of larger hard drive for the consumer version of the tablet, that is.

My favorite part of Surface is that its cover that doubles as a keyboard and a built-in kickstand. Attaching via a magnetic connector, the cover has a 3mm width that is essentially a touchscreen itself. The Pro version also has a pen that clicks into the tablet which allows users to make handwritten notes on documents (I so want this for work). I hate peripherals that make life easier for device users (the docking station for my smart phone, for example) and aren’t included, because I feel like it’s a money grab from manufacturers. When you buy a Surface, at least you’ll get these two items bundled in.

While Microsoft withheld most of the devices technical specs, they did tell us a little bit about the Surface and the Surface Pro. They will both have a 10.6 inch high-definition touchscreen, front and rear facing cameras all in a 9.3 millimeter, 1.5-pound frame made of magnesium (the Pro version weights a whopping 2 pounds). The aspect ratio  is 16:9, which is suited to watching widescreen video.

The real question, is how does this stack up against Apple’s iPad? While Microsoft failed to answer that question concretely, we do know that the touch screen for the iPad is only 9.7 inches and its aspect ratio is 4:3. The Surface will be compatible with Microsoft Office (something the iPad can’t boast), but since most people use their tablet for recreation anyways, this doesn’t help them too much.

So while we don’t have any real hardware specs, know how long the battery will last, know how much either version will cost, we do know that Microsoft’s tablet will be released online and in Microsoft stores sometime in Autumn. In other words, we know shit all except that they’re releasing a tablet that runs on Windows 8, has a built in keyboard and stands all on its own.

Hopefully it won’t be a complete dude like the Zune, but maybe with Smart Glass in the mix, we’ll be seeing a new innovation in how we connect all our devices together. That’s not to mention how this could effect gaming, but with so little facts out on either Surface or Smart Glass, it’s all just speculation.

About a month ago on the podcast I co-host (5wowthings), we had @OriginalOestrus as a guest and discussed Magic: The Gathering (linked here if you want to listen). @thebiggameover wanted to know how magic worked, and we explained to him it is a very difficult game to learn.

If you don’t know, Magic: The Gathering is a trading card game created by Wizard’s of the Coast, the same guys who make the Dungeons and Dragons table top game. A game of Magic represents a battle between planeswalkers, who employ the magical spells, items, and creatures (depicted on individual Magic cards) to defeat their opponents. It has a very organized tournament system from which a community of professional Magic players has developed.

While a lot of people have heard of Magic, not many know how to get into the game. Some who have tried have found the rule set daunting because, let’s face it, there are hundreds of rules to learn and only hard core players know them all. After listening to that episode, Sidenorna, one of our newer listeners, wrote me on a good way to teach someone. So if you know someone who would like to learn, or would like to learn and know someone who plays, direct them here as she has written up a great teacher’s guide.

I have played Magic: The Gathering on and off and again for many years. Now, to master Magic is a lot of work, but not to learn it. Magic in it’s whole is overly complex filled with details and some odd rules, but the basic game of magic can be broken down in many easier steps. Here is the key that has helped me teach a few people over the years.

Step one, start with two super basic decks made of about 40 cards. Use only creature cards and lands of one color and limit the abilities the creatures have to simple and passive abilities, or none at all. Things like flying, first strike, pumping, the basics that are easy to understand. Avoid abilities that require tapping or abilities that are spell like. Play a game as normal with the person learning, teaching them the untap, upkeep, draw, main, attack, and then second main phases. The key is to keep it simple. I know this may be boring to the teacher, but the point is to teach, not to have fun just yet.

Once the new player has this down, add in a new type of card; either enchantments/ artifacts, or sorceries. Things that are not creatures that are usable only on your turn. Again, make sure you keep the spells simple. After they are familiar with the rules of those types of spells, add in instant spells.

Above all else, if they having a hard time getting a rule or idea slow down. Sure those are only three phases and one big one that is a bit vague, but they can be broken down into smaller steps. The big issue with teaching magic most people have is they want new players to dive right in, but much like anything worth doing this it is about taking small steps.

And there you have it, guys. Keep it simple, break it into smaller steps. I’ve learned from teaching my cousins that the attack phase is the hardest to understand, so remember to break that up especially. Hope you found this as useful as I did (I think I can teach my youngest cousin to play now), so have fun and game on!

Doesn’t look very broken, now does it? I figure one of the little bits and bobs on the inside that they make in Japan and I don’t understand at all broke off and can be fixed by being soldered back on. I don’t have any idea how to do that, so I just use the other controller I own and this sits around as a paper weight.

No big deal. Well, there is this spot:

That’s where the paint tore when this got ripped off the wall by the flying controller:

It’s just a hook I use to hang stuff on. I have several and there’s about a foot of space between each so it’s damn good aim on my part. But to be honest, this isn’t the first time I’ve thrown a controller, or anything that is immensely pissing me off. I broke a flute once and my steering wheel receives a lot of abuse.

Some people think it’s immature and sure, why not. I’m not going to debate the maturity of it, but you know what? When that controller made a sickening thud against the wall I felt a hell of a lot better. I externalize my anger, screaming, shouting and throwing shit because it makes me feel better. It relieves my stress.

So to the guy who said:

People who smash $50 controllers are childish douche bags. What a fucking waste of not only $50 but also the parts/materials that goes into making a controller. Plain stupid.

Video games shouldn’t be taken so seriously….

I want you to know that next time I’m stuck on the same boss for over two hours, that controller is gonna sale across the room once more and I’m perfectly alright with the immaturity in that.

of·fend

Cause to feel upset, annoyed, or resentful.

hyp·o·crite

A person who indulges in hypocrisy.

hy·poc·ri·sy

The practice of claiming to have moral standards or beliefs to which one’s own behavior does not conform; pretense.

Definitions for those who decide to argue with me in the comments. Let’s be at least on the same page to start out with.

For those World of Warcraft players living under a rock, there was a large “scandal” involving Blizzard and a character named Jii Firepaw. He said some shit and it made people upset, so blizzard changed it. I didn’t care. I didn’t care it was offensive and I didn’t care that it was changed to be less offensive. What I do care about is the backlash to these women’s opinion; the people who were offended that they were offended.

As always when a minority speaks out, whether that be transgender, homosexuals or feminists, those more concerned with their own comfort than the message being presented flipped their shit. Messages like the following popped up everywhere:

I see some of these same players tweeting that someone harassed them in RL while walking down the street, at work, said something rude, made a grab at them, etc. I have never personally done this, nor ever witnessed any male or female in my presence ever do anything beyond give a “check them out” look. I bet if I merely walked by some of these people perhaps held the door for them and said “Hi, nice day isn’t it” they’d scream “PERV WHY ARE YOU TRYING TO MARGINALIZE ME?!” Um, I was being nice and making conversation…but ok.

I won’t even start in on the idiocy of such statements. I will point out that this criticism has nothing to do with the issue at hand, but is a common knee jerk reaction some men have whenever they hear the word “sexism.” Unfortunately, some feminists have their own knee jerk reactions that boils down to: if you’re not offended with me, you’re a horrible, terrible person and insist they’re speaking for “all women.”

And that’s where the beginnings of my rage starts. Ceraphus, of The Sundering podcast got tired of that argument, as most people who just don’t give a fuck are likely to be, and wrote a blog saying as much. Towards the end, his message gets a little lost when he discusses how he wants diverse characters who are sexist and says incidents like the Jii Firepaw dialogue are “minor infractions.” Immediately the feminists were all over him, missing the entire message of his blog and honing in on the parts where the meaning could be interpreted in a way that had nothing to do with Ceraphus’ point. On this part, Oestrus said it best in her blog:

We have become so wrapped up in drawing our battle lines, in giving certain words or phrases so much power over us that we have forgotten what goes into those words to trigger these responses in us.  We have stopped asking people what they mean when they do or say things and we just take these words or these actions at face value.  In the rare occasions where someone is asked what they meant by something they did or said, it’s very likely that the person who is asking the question already has their mind made up and there is nothing that the person on the receiving end of the question can do to change their minds.  They have already decided that this person has done wrong and they are basically just asking for clarification to drive their point home.  They have no intention of giving this person the opportunity to clear the air or to right a perceived wrong.

Rightly so, Ceraphus was pissed about the personal attacks that came from the feminists and decided to make it a discussion topic on his podcast. The discussion started and ended with insults of those who called for Jii Firepaw to have his dialogue changed and everyone being offended at the people offended. The comments came mostly from the listeners, not from the hosts, but in the end, they did agree with these people. The message ended up coming across as, “If you don’t like it, tough and shut up because I’m not bothered by it.” They told those who were offended to seek help, without knowing if they already were trying to get help, or with much sympathy for why people could be offended by this one line. Instead, they were insisting that these feminists should deal with their feelings because they should never have been insulted in the first place, that they should have kept quiet so they can have a diverse, sexist character to make the World of Warcraft more realistic.

But why? Why does it matter so much if these people care that a dialogue offended them? It was one line. It does not affect me in any way if that one line is offending or if it’s being changed. One line of dialogue does not form a character’s personality, it does not craft a story, it does not change who Jii Firepaw is. The leader of the Horde Pandarens made one sexist comment and that does not make him sexist. Blizzard did not have to go through and change all his lines, just one. So how can anyone say he was meant to be a diverse, sexist, flawed character in the first place?

Llandrywyn on the MMOC forums said:

“If a character can be conveyed in the same terms, for the same overall feeling and with the same overall character traits, is it not just good and respectful practice for the designers to minimize content that might offend?”

Besides that, what is wrong with being respectful of other’s views, whether or not we agree with them? Not everyone arguing for a change insisted they had to be agreed with. They didn’t all call Ceraphus names and tell him he was horrible for not caring about this sexist comment. Oestrus said it best, “If I have to respect someone’s right to be offended, then they have to respect my right to not be offended. That’s all I’m saying.”

And that’s all I’m saying! Stop caring about other people caring! If you are bitching about the people who are bitching, you’re a hypocrite, plain and simple. Everyone has their own pet peeves, is offended by something trivial and has the right to express that just as you have the right to not be bothered by it. They don’t have to sit quiet and take it and if what they want doesn’t affect you, why are you fighting against it?